I’ve been trying my best to ignore it but I can no longer pretend that this isn’t happening. I am trying to be good. I really am. But I can’t pretend anymore that Germany isn’t out to get me. For Superman, it was Kryptonite. For Achilles, his heel that was untouched by the River Styx. For me, it is the aisles and aisles of German Christmas Chocolate. I know what you’re thinking: October’s pretty early for Christmas Chocolate to hit the shops. It is. And the scary thing is that it’s been in the stores for nearly three weeks. Seriously. Advent calendar in September anyone? Do you know how hard it is to navigate the aisles of a crowded supermarket whilst trying desperately to avert your gaze from the skyscraper towers of festively wrapped sugary goodness?
I’ve tried. I’ve tried to get away from it. To not look. But I can’t do it anymore. I love Christmas. I love chocolate. Together, they are a formidable combination. How long is a girl expected to hold out and not give in to the Schoko-Lubkuchen, the Zimtsterern, the Vanillekipferl, the Stollen, the Barbie sized chocolate santas, the 1lb bags of milk chocolate balls, the marzipan squares wrapped like tiny presents? HOW LONG?!
The Germans know what they’re doing when it comes to Christmas. The wrappings of these festive treats, for instance, are strictly traditional. There’s none of that millennium themed silver and blue colour scheme, no Purple Ronnie stick figures wearing Santa hats and blowing noise makers. They stick to the tried and tested red, green, gold and snow. Sometimes there’s a log cabin on a snowy mountain side. Sometimes, they’ll include some reindeer, possibly a fat Santa. There are bells, holly, sleighs, baubles (in gold, red and green only), candy canes, fat wax pillar candles with their little wicks aglow. Now, add that Christmassy goodness to a box of candy and I am up against powers far greater than me. I’m just a girl who’s not supposed to eat sugar. With that in mind, maybe Germany wasn’t the best idea I've ever had.
I was pretty sad that I’m going to be leaving Germany before the Christmas Markets... But I see now that it’s a bit of a blessing in disguise. There is no way I would be able to behave myself at one of those.
I’ve tried. I’ve tried to get away from it. To not look. But I can’t do it anymore. I love Christmas. I love chocolate. Together, they are a formidable combination. How long is a girl expected to hold out and not give in to the Schoko-Lubkuchen, the Zimtsterern, the Vanillekipferl, the Stollen, the Barbie sized chocolate santas, the 1lb bags of milk chocolate balls, the marzipan squares wrapped like tiny presents? HOW LONG?!
The Germans know what they’re doing when it comes to Christmas. The wrappings of these festive treats, for instance, are strictly traditional. There’s none of that millennium themed silver and blue colour scheme, no Purple Ronnie stick figures wearing Santa hats and blowing noise makers. They stick to the tried and tested red, green, gold and snow. Sometimes there’s a log cabin on a snowy mountain side. Sometimes, they’ll include some reindeer, possibly a fat Santa. There are bells, holly, sleighs, baubles (in gold, red and green only), candy canes, fat wax pillar candles with their little wicks aglow. Now, add that Christmassy goodness to a box of candy and I am up against powers far greater than me. I’m just a girl who’s not supposed to eat sugar. With that in mind, maybe Germany wasn’t the best idea I've ever had.
I was pretty sad that I’m going to be leaving Germany before the Christmas Markets... But I see now that it’s a bit of a blessing in disguise. There is no way I would be able to behave myself at one of those.
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